10May
4

Mum - Please Accept My Humblest Apologies…

Dear Mum,

You know, right now I kind of hate you.  You who is often right, you who knows better than I and you who always knows how to magically turn my kids into mirror images of me (Be careful what you wish for?  No, too late for that!).

The last 6 years, I have been a mother myself, and you a grandmother.  I have made mistakes and learnt from them (and yours) and grown as a whole.  Parenting is such a wonderful experience but it is tough…much tougher than I was truly prepared for.

Well, my darling mother, I now understand your frustrations, and I apologies profusely that you had to go through what I am now going through.  Yes, my girls throw tanties, but I doubt they are as bad as mine were, or maybe it is just I have found better ways to deal with them, who knows.

I apologise for how sore and tired your ears must be.  The chatter of a child is pleasing, except when it is non stop, even when they are asleep.  The incessant nature of it is truly nerve breaking and now I understand why you found it hard to deal with.  I wish I could go back and sew a zip on my own mouth for you.

I apologise for the cracked record syndrome you seem to have been left with.  Saying things over and over and over again is truly boring, and I get that…now.  There is only so many times you can say the same thing before you explode!!!!

I apologise for the obvious statements I used to make, or more correctly, for stating the obvious.  Yes, I have my own 6 year old now who seems to have inherited this trait from me and I am writing this sitting on the ceiling as that is where I have been driven too (I do anticipate being back on the ground for the next time you visit though).

I apologise for my slothfulness.  Oh boy, doesn’t the husband give me a glare when our girls go slow.  Even the teachers have noticed that I have my own, dawdling little sloth.  What a pain in the neck it is to hear or say ‘hurry up, finish it now, you only have this much time left…’  all day every day.

I apologise for my wonderful timing and offers of help.  Yes, my own daughters love to help mummy and daddy, but they too seem to have the ability of making the offer to help just as the task is being completed.  Yes, it is nice to have the offer, but it could have come sooner!

I apologise for my messiness and grumbling about keeping my room clean.  Oh boy, 2 messy princesses so far, with 3 more to show their true colours in this area!  Now, I’m still not the neatest person, but I am working on it and intend on making our new home as clutter free as possible without taking away that ‘lived in by a family’ feel.

Well, my darling mother, you wished that I would one day have a daughter of my own that were just like me, and guess what?  I have not 1, but 5 of them!

Happy Mother’s Day.  May you have a great, peaceful day, laughing at me for now truly understanding just how a parent feels when their child turns into a terror.  You now have your icing on the cake, so enjoy a slice and keep some for me for when I am a grandmother.

Posted by arna in Special Events & Mentions and tagged with , , , | Trackback
  1. Katherine Lesley Cook (aka Mum) says:
    May 10, 2009 at 11:49 am

    Darling Arnis .. you don’t need to apologise .. that’s what being a Mum is all about! What a beautifully written story - smoothed over with a bit of wry humour!! :)

    Yes, at times it can be exhausting and in my own case, Freeman was often away and I worked two small businesses (sometimes till 11pm at night and then up at 4am with Resolution work and then all day sewing with Pushpa) and had you three girls to look after so I was pretty tired for all those parenting years ..

    I apologise to you too that I didn’t make a good job of being two parents wrapped up in one, let alone as a fully functioning mother at times, and it’s sad Shaun hasn’t been that good a father too. Freeman did his best but found it easier to just let you be than to be quite so actively involved.

    So apologies all round darling girl and rest assured I am sorry I used to “coin that phrase” - a little bit of history now - my mother used to say that to me!!!! I was always a bit of a independent spirit too and baulked quite regularly at discipline - so you see it just a case of karma - what goes around comes around.

    I am sorry you have FIVE though and on the other hand glad that I only had ONE!!! I do love you though Arna and am so enjoying that you find talking so much easier these days.

    Please keep in touch pet (I don’t have your new address) and I will too!
    Thank you for this though it made very pleasing and emotional reading! :)
    You are a treasured daughter of mine.

    Promise me now that you will never apologise again for being a child and remember that I was your fifth primary care giver in your first two years of life .. that made things difficult right from the start darling.

    With much love
    Mum (aka Lali) xxxxxxooooo

    PS HAPPY MOTHERS DAY TO YOU DAUGHTER OF MINE :) :)

  2. arna says:
    May 10, 2009 at 12:31 pm

    Mum,

    The humour is the only thing you get to keep when you have kids. Out goes the social life, goodbye waistline, ta-ta sleep, by-by sanity, so long memory, but ah, the humour just stays hanging around to balance all that out!

    Yes well, Shaun is another matter. A free spirit who seems to be a bit more tame these days, by a woman who didn’t have kids, so I think there in was the key! He could still come and visit once in a while, especially seeing as we aren’t that far from a beach! And Freeman? Dare I say, for a scientist, he had very little clue about the science of children! At least he was around more, tried hard and sometimes got through to me.

    You did a fantastic job! More than those other 4 primary carers did and I am alive and well, and able to at least understand that life is full of shit that needs to be kicked out of the way sometimes before you get to the good pasture beneath it.

    Well, address? Oh no, you don’t need that! Just wait til midnight and follow the corellas. They seem to flock around and have a midnight play here! Oh all right, will send to you.

    You have a nice relaxing day, I think I’m doing enough washing for both of us!

  3. Katherine Lesley Cook says:
    May 10, 2009 at 8:02 pm

    THANK YOU DARLING …I LOVE YOU… THANK YOU FOR TELLING ME I DID AN OK JOB .. I KNOW I LACKED …. BUT I ALSO KNOW, UNDER THE CIRCUMSTANCES, I DID MY VERY BEST!!! AND THAT WAS ALL I COULD DO (AS WILL YOU, MY DARLING GIRL)

    IT IS UNFORTUNATE THAT CHILDREN DON’T COME WITH AN INSTRUCTION BOOK (ISN’T IT!!)

    YOU HAVE A GREAT DAY .. AND REMEMBER I AM ALWAYS HERE FOR YOU …. LOVE ALWAYS :)

    MUCH LOVE ALWAYS
    MUM XXXXXXOOOOOO

  4. arna says:
    May 10, 2009 at 8:12 pm

    You did a great job given what you had to work with. Such grace and dignity did you display while trying to ignore the newest tantrum. Yes, we all do our best.

    I would rethink that bit about it being unfortunate that children don’t come with an instruction book, it was hard enough to push the child out, let alone a book that has corners and sharp edges! Maybe an instructional microSD card, but a book? LOL.

    I know you are always there…somewhere…when you aren’t gallavanting around the world..

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